That's right, I know you missed me. All of my reader out there must have been distraught when I stopped posting. But Dave, why would you stop posting to your incredibly successful and popular blog? Two reasons. First, it was never that successful or popular. Second, I got a job. That's right, I joined the ranks of the gainfully employed. For the sake of the company's privacy, they shall remain unnamed, but I will give a hint. It's not a male strip club called The Third Leg.
I even moved away from my beloved New York. I'm now living in a lovely little house on a lake in Assachusetts. Days are spent frolicking with squirrels and chasing geese on the water. Actually that's not true, my days are spent at a desk wearing a tie. You heard it right, a tie. Dave has officially sold out. I wear ties and suits and proper fancy shoes. I even wear socks and underwear almost every day.
So what does all this mean for you, my darling reader? Nothing at all.
As of yet, I have not been kidnapped and taken back to my adoring fans in central China, but its been a slow week. I do miss China though. I miss being famous only because I'm a big bearded white guy. That's not special here in New England. And speaking of New England, I had no idea there was even an Olde England, let alone a new one. Theres an accent here, but its not charming or sophisticated. People don't drink tea, they ride the T.
Also, is it a coincidence that Mass Pike rhymes with Ass Spike? I don't think so. I think theres correlation there. Think about it.
No comments:
Post a Comment