Wednesday, January 26, 2011

In Soviet Russia Jobs Hunt You!

Ive run into an ethical dilemna in my job hunting. You see, Im against hunting. It seems like a deer has absolutely no chance against a rifle. The only way the deer can win that fight is if the hunter misses. Now I realize a job isnt a deer, but Im still called a hunter. Can I in good conscience look down the barrel of my resume at a prospective employer and pull the trigger of employment? If I miss, do I have the ability to reload and fire off another resume before the frightened employer runs into the brush?
What most concerns me is bears. I have a fear that at any moment a bear might appear behind me and maul me. To put it in the terms of this metaphor, I guess Im frightened by the prospect of a large intimidating employer sneaking up and hiring me from behind. Is there an HR grizzly bear silently stalking me? Would I know it if there was?
Wading through these comically mixed metaphors, I do come to one serious note. I need a job. And fast. Cause things cost money and theft is frowned upon.

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