The Six Lamest Comic Book Movie Villains, Part Three

There are two great things coming out today. Of course the first is the third part of my series entitled The Six Lamest Comic Book Movies Villains. The other awesome thing coming out today is a little movie called The Avengers. I will be seeing it Sunday at 1:20. Why not today or tomorrow you ask, well the answer is simple. I'm not seeing it today because I'm sure it will be full of annoying people in super-hero t-shirts. I'm not seeing it tomorrow because it's my mother-in-laws birthday and we'll be celebrating that instead. So without further ado, I present......

The Six Lamest Comic Book Movie Villains, Part Three

2. The Hulk - Gamma Dogs
It's a well documented fact that I love dogs. I also love the Hulk. So putting them together seems like a no-brainer. Well that's exactly how much brain Ang Lee was using when he put these three Hulked out canines in the first Hulk movie. In the film, Bruce Banners Father, played by mugshot-worthy Nick Nolte, mutates his three dogs using Gamma rays or something. Honestly, who cares?
What resulted were some of the most ridiculous looking creatures to ever be captured on film. Two of the dogs had such overmuscled heads that they looked like caricatures. It looked like someone took their dog down to the boardwalk and payed a caricature artist to draw their dog. Oh yeah, and one of the dogs was a poodle.

No caption is needed. 

I know when I think of scary, intimidating dogs, a poodle pops to mind first. I had a poodle growing up. He was a big goofy sweetheart but he inspired fear in precisely nobody. Even the cat would push him around. I don't even know what that other dog is. It looks like a Choco Taco with teeth. And for some reason, these absurd beasts managed to give the Hulk a run for his money. The only part of the scene that didn't completely suck was when Hulk punched one of them in its gamma mutated balls.
I'm now picturing my Cocker Spaniel Flexxo as a Gamma Dog. He would be terrifying, licking his enemies and snoring at them. No joke, he's currently laying next to me, snoring like a chainsaw with his tongue sticking out. Scary, I know.

1. X-Men: The Last Stand - Kid Omega
Here we are with the lamest villain ever. The third X-Men movie was, to put it kindly, crap on wheels. The filmmakers decided to jam as many mutants in it as possible, failing on most of them. But no failure was as great as Kid Omega, also known as Porcupine Boy.

It looks like he has spiny muttonchops

First of all, in the comics, that's not Kid Omega. Kid Omega was a super-smart telepath. Kind of like Professor X, only with hair and the ability to walk. X-Men 3 decided to take the name and slap it on Porcupine Boy, hoping nobody would care. Nobody did. He uses his powers twice in the movie. Once to "intimidate" Pyro and Magneto (obviously didn't work). The second time was to kill a scientist with an awesome accent.
How did he kill this scientist? By hugging her. Seriously. He hugged her and popped his spines out, stabbing her dozens of times with tiny pricks. Basically, if you pet him with the grain, you'll be ok. He was supposed to be a real villain in this movie, but instead comes off as a joke. He's part man, part hedgehog, not exactly the deadliest combination.
So its you Kid Omega. You are the lamest comic book movie villain of all time. May you munch upon all the bugs you can and be kept as a pet by a little British boy.