The Dutch Are Masters

Its Presidents Day. In honor of that, I"m going to not give a $#!+. Seriously, it was fairly arbitrarily chosen based on its general proximity to the birthdays of a couple presidents. Meanwhile, about 40 of the other ones get shafted on the celebrations. Its not that I don't care about the president, I voted Obama and I intend on doing it again (he needs more than four years after Bush broke the world).
Instead I think I will honor the badass citizens of the most unlikely place, Rotterdam. First of all, I didn't even know where Rotterdam was. I had to Google it to find out that its in the Netherlands. I also learned that its the second largest city in the Netherlands and apparently does not consist fully of white people. Most importantly, the voice of Scrooge McDuck is from that great, badass city.

His nephews were Belgian scum though

Recently, some of the criminals from the awesome haven of drugs and prostitution known as Amsterdam have moved south (or whatever direction it is) to Rotterdam, figuring that they were easy pickings. One such robber learned the hard way not to funk with a Dutchman's beer drinking. I recommend watching the video below in full but I'll give you the gist of it. Basically, a dude walked into a pub with a gun and demanded everybody hand over their money, valuables and any Vermeers they might have. I assume that all people in the Netherlands carry original Vermeers with them at all times. The patrons responded by not noticing him and instead continuing their convivial drinking.

I learned that not only is Rotterdam the sister city of Baltimore, but its residents are among the least caring most baddest asses in the world. One dude even politely taps the robber on the shoulder because he was blocking the bar. The best part is that once the patrons realized that their favorite pub was being robbed, they gathered to chase the bastard out of the bar and down the street, catching him over two kilometers away. I don't know how far two kilometers is cause I'm American, but I'm guessing its way farther than I can run. And considering I don't run at all, its not as impressive all of a sudden.
This reminds me of the time I was hiking and a bear tried to attack me. I was on my phone so I held up one finger, finished my call, smoked a quick cigarette, and then chased the bear away by yelling quotes from Tron. Ah who am I kidding, I don't hike.
So on this Presidents Day, I honor you fine badass citizens of Rotterdam. You are truly the Presidents of Badassville and we salute you.