Bonus!

Because I'm flighty and unpredictable, I've decided to write an additional entry in the series entitled "Yeah Right". Todays bonus entry will follow the extremely unlikely event of Jimmy McMillan becoming President of the United States. Who is Jimmy McMillan you might ask?

This guy

Jimmy McMillan has run, unsuccessfully, for mayor of New York City and even senator of New York State. Clearly he has lost all these attempts. Jimmy runs as chairman of the Rent is Too Damn High Party. As you might be able to guess, his primary platform is that the rent is too damn high. So now that you know a bit about our fictional future president, I take you to the future, all the way to the year 2015.

President McMillan has successfully passed measures establishing the nations first rent ceiling. For the first time in decades, the rent is not too damn high. Homelessness has plummeted, and the landlords of America have formed a rival group called the Rent Is Too Damn Low Party. Nobody has any sympathy for them. 

Same-sex marriage has been extended to all states. Despite President McMillan's declaration that "if you want to marry a shoe, I'll marry you", people have not started wedding their clothing. However, sex with ducks is now rampant. Go on, click the link. You know you're curious. I'll wait. 

Not what you though it was huh? Anyway, with all the money being saved on rent, people are putting it towards their childrens education. Literacy rates skyrocket alongside sales of e-readers. SAT scores begin rising steadily. With all of the surplus money, people are eating out more often, leading to the first of the Franchise Wars. By 2015, the only chain restaurants left are Taco Bell and Good Burger.

10 points if you can tell me why Good Burger survived

President McMillan has already begun campaigning for re-election on the new Deficit Is Too Damn High platform. Pundits are predicting his win and have declared his beard the best since Chester A. Arthur.

Those are some good muttonchops

Aliens land in early 2015 and declare their allegiance to President McMillan, assuming that he is King of Earth due to the volume of this voice. Nobody disagrees with them.